Feelings of Loss and Grief During a Global Pandemic

 

The coronavirus pandemic has seemed alternately surreal and scary for most of us. The mix of emotions we feel might be changing on a daily (or even hourly) basis. The important thing to know during these challenging times is that there is no right (or wrong) way to feel. Even if you have not lost a loved one recently, one of the many emotions you might be feeling as the COVID-19 crisis continues is grief. According to Scott Berinato, author of “That Discomfort You’re Feeling is Grief,” “if we can name it, perhaps we can manage it.” By identifying grief as one of the many realities of living through a global pandemic, we can, hopefully, find a path forward.

In this article, we will discuss:

  • What grief looks like 

  • How grief might be impacting your day-to-day life

  • How to cope with grief during the COVID-19 crisis

  • How AICC can help

sadness


What Grief Looks Like

Grief is a complex emotion that involves more than sadness. In fact, grief can take the shape of anger, numbness, and denial at different times.

You might find yourself avoiding certain places, people, or things because the sense of loss is still too great.

You might have a hard time feeling much of anything, including joy and happiness over things that once brought you both.

You might even find yourself unable to believe or accept that your loss has occurred. All of this is normal. And all of this is okay.

According to the website HealGrief.org, symptoms or signs of grief might also include:

  • shock and disbelief

  • sadness

  • guilt

  • fear

  • physical pain

Whatever grief symptoms you are experiencing, it is important to allow yourself the opportunity to grieve.

In the article “Understanding Grief and Loss: An Overview,” authors note that during times of grief, you should “treat yourself with kindness, compassion and without judgment. You have the right to grieve, and no one — including yourself — can tell you when it’s time to end that process.” 

Grief in Your Daily Life

Against the backdrop of the coronavirus crisis, you might be feeling the emotions described above in response to the impact of social distancing, job loss, the abrupt change to your routine, and the loss of activities you once enjoyed.

You might also be distressed by the economic impact of coronavirus on yourself, your loved ones, and the community.

In so many ways, the situation we are collectively in is unprecedented. There is no playbook. Hopelessness may be compounding the uncomfortable emotions you're already feeling.

Taken together, this emotional mix begins to feel a great deal like the grief you would experience if you lost a loved one. 

If you’re experiencing grief as a result of the COVID-crisis, pay attention to your grief triggers.

Grief in the age of coronavirus can be triggered simply by day-to-day activities. That essential trip to the grocery suddenly feels scary once you observe all the masks, gloves, and taped-off distancing patterns.

Holiday decor reminds you that a special day will pass without a family gathering, which may feel like a painful loss.

Photos and mementos will remind you of happier and more certain times.

The evening news has also become a powerful trigger that might send your blood pressure soaring.

Do your best to avoid the triggers you can, and practice positive self-talk when you cannot.

Also, remember that acceptance is a stage of grief, too. As Berinato reminds us, “Acceptance, as you might imagine, is where the power lies. We find control in acceptance. I can wash my hands. I can keep a safe distance. I can learn how to work virtually.” 

Coping with Grief

At the same time we are working through grief toward acceptance, Berinato recommends practicing mindfulness and letting go of what we cannot control: “You can also think about how to let go of what you can’t control. What your neighbor is doing is out of your control. What is in your control is staying six feet away from them and washing your hands. Focus on that.” 

Grief counseling can be another important way to protect your mental health during times of loss and sorrow.

Combining therapy with other self care practices is an excellent way to combat the anxiety caused by grief or feelings of loss.

When you begin to talk through your feelings and learn strategies to help you cope, you may also begin to feel a greater sense of control and acceptance in these difficult times. 

How AICC Can Help

At AICC, we offer many counseling options for adults and for children. At a time when nothing seems certain, you can protect your mental health by making telemental health counseling a part of your self care routine.

We are here to match you with the right counselor and therapeutic experience for YOU! 

Please call to discuss your options with our team. As our own Dr. Christi Bartolomucci notes, “Every part of our experience can bring purpose and meaning.”

Remember that we offer telemental health services to keep you and your family safe during this time. AICC is here to support you as you cope with the impact of coronavirus in your daily life. We look forward to connecting with you soon. 








 
Laura Howard